The Order of Things

Yesterday was 07/08/09, 7-8-9. Reading my friend Eric's status message, I was notified that at 12:34 and 56 seconds yesterday, the time was 123456789. This got me thinking about the general order of things around this world, any and all.

The Chicken and The Egg

I scarcely remember a time when I was a small child, barely able to walk, and I was toddling around the San Diego Zoo with my family. To this day, I am extremely confused why there happened to be a flock (band? brood? colony? goggle?) of chickens walking in the pedestrian area of the zoo. I couldn't have been more than 2 years old, so I decided to play with one of the baby chicks and the mother hen did not appreciate this. She pecked my fat little baby legs and I wailed to the high heavens. My mother hen did not appreciate that.

Order of Operations

Please Excuse Me....for using this lame math reference.

MVEMSUN...P?

Back when I was your age kid, Pluto was a planet. You see, we now classify Pluto as a dwarf planet, in Neptunian orbit for 20 years out of its rotation. Pluto's rotation period is the same as its satellite Charon and while this is not uncommon for a planet, it is uncommon to rotate synchronously with the satellite's orbit causing the two bodies to face each other throughout rotation.

Pluto is also a cartoon dog.

Drill Sergeant Orders

Although not all orders, this is a perfect medium for a few military movie quotes from superiors:

Forrest Gump:
Drill Sergeant: Gump! What's your sole purpose in this army?
Forrest Gump: To do whatever you tell me, drill sergeant!
Drill Sergeant: God d*** it, Gump! You're a god d*** genius! This is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard. You must have a godd*** I.Q. of 160. You are godd*** gifted, Private Gump. Listen up, people...

Lt. Dan: "Two standing orders in this platoon: One, take good care of your feet, Two, try not to do anything stupid, like getting yourself killed."
Forrest Gump: "I sure hope I don't let him down."

Full Metal Jacket:
Gunnery Sergeant Hartman: If you ladies leave my island, if you survive recruit training, you will be a weapon. You will be a minister of death praying for war. But until that day you are pukes. You are the lowest form of life on Earth. You are not even human, f***ing beings. You are nothing but unorganized grabastic pieces of amphibian s***. Because I am hard you will not like me. But the more you hate me the more you will learn. I am hard but I am fair. There is no racial bigotry here. I do not look down on n-s, k-s, w-s or g-s. Here you are all equally worthless. And my orders are to weed out all non-hackers who do not pack the gear to serve in my beloved Corps. Do you maggots understand that?

In the Army Now:
1st Sgt. Brandon T. Williams: Have my words fallen upon deaf ears?
Bones: Yes, Sergeant! I mean No, Sergeant!
1st Sgt. Brandon T. Williams: Don't you know that I'm your First Seargent?
Bones: I really wish you were my First Sergeant, but I already had a couple ones already.

Confederation's Cup, World Cup

The world just witnessed the United States almost pull off a miracle in the Confederation's Cup a few weeks ago. This soccer tournament, as I understand, is a tune-up in the country that will host the World Cup the following year (you can criticize my soccer knowledge. I am sure that is somehow wrong).

The news came out yesterday that South African laborers are going on strike and this may cause a delay in the World Cup timeline because the stadiums are not finished being built or renovated. At the risk of analyzing this politically, a couple of thoughts come to mind:

1. The laborers now earn an average of $1.75 per hour and are looking for a 13 percent increase. The difference of life in Africa versus America is...well...different.

2. It reminds me of the scene in "Ocean's Thirteen" where the Mexican laborers go on strike. Clooney and gang write a $40,000 check to get it figured out. It seems to me that this is relatively little money and some rich, soccer happy nation is quietly going to get this under wraps.

3. Seems a little late to be trying to get this figured out. Especially since that is what the Confed cup, host site approval process and previous three years of preparation are for. FIFA officials all presented a confident front after the tournament was over and now this. Plan ahead.

Order Edentata

Or, toothless mammals. Three families of mammals get by without teeth: Dasypodidae (armadillos), Bradypodidae (sloths), and Myrmecophagidae (hairy anteaters).

Just for clarification, hairy and non-hairy anteaters are in different families of animals? Do you think you could tell the difference between a hairy and non-hairy anteater? Just look for the hair right? It just can't be that simple...

ABC

Its easy as 1-2-3. RIP Mike.

Computational Complexity Theory

AKA order of computation, describes complexity or scalability in computational complexity theory and Big O notation.

I definitely don't know what this is but I found it on Wikipedia. Someone much smarter than me could probably explain it to you.

Fraternal Orders

There comes a time in the life of many college-aged men where he must walk through a sorority house naked. He must find thousands of skittles at the bottom of a swimming pool, bring them to the surface, and organize by color...blindfolded. He must hit his friends with a paddle and sample an entire can of wet dog food. He must suffer for days from lack of sleep, wrestle in a plastic swimming pool full of wet noodles with homeless men and drink water until they regurgitate.

If further bonding is needed, alcohol provides a necessary cognitive release, whereas the fraternity member can pass out on a couch and be marked with Sharpie, duck-taped to a wheelbarrow and be left in the middle of campus. He can also sing "Blinded by the Light," or "Don't Stop Believing" at the top of his lungs with his comrades at 2 o'clock in the morning.

Thankfully, I am past that time.

I have moved on to "Living on a Prayer."

Hors d'oeuvres

Kinda sounds like order.

Past, Present, Future

For an interesting observation on this order, take a look at Disneyland's "Tomorrow Land." Granted, it may have changed since I have been there, but all I saw were rides made in the 1960's like "Space Mountain" and the "People Mover" that looked like they were made in the 1980's. Tomorrow Land looks like the yesterday before yesterday's land.

Also, check out George Orwell's novel "1984." It seems, at times, that we may be getting closer to this society, but we definitely weren't there in 1984. Interesting to see people's version of the future after that time has passed...past....eh ....futured...um...presented.

Disorder

is way more fun than order.

End The.